Low Confidence/ Self-esteem
What is Low Confidence/ Self-esteem?
The level of confidence that we all have, is based our belief in our own abilities and capabilities. When we lose this trust or faith in ourselves and what we can achieve, it often results in lowering our self confidence and in turn creates a negative perception of how we view ourselves.
These beliefs that we have about ourselves can often appear to be statements of fact, although, they are in fact just opinions we create of ourselves, based on our own experiences and what these experiences tell us about the kind of people that we are. If we perceive our experiences as negative then it is likely that our beliefs about ourselves in turn, will be negative. These negative beliefs often result in low self-esteem.
Crucial experiences that help to form our beliefs about ourselves often occur during our early years, as children. What we experienced in school, at home and in the community, will have influenced the way we see ourselves. Parent’s attitudes towards their children at this time, can also be a huge contributing factor in helping to shape their child’s confidence and self-esteem.
How is Low Confidence/ Self-esteem developed?
Crucial experiences that help to form our beliefs about ourselves often occur during our early years, as children. What we experienced in school, at home and in the community, will have influenced the way we see ourselves. Parent’s attitudes towards their children at this time, can also be a huge contributing factor in helping to shape their child’s confidence and self-esteem. If a child is criticised often from a young age, they may grow up with the belief that they are not capable of succeeding and this may create a negative self image.
Lack of self-confidence is not necessarily related to lack of ability. Often it can result from holding unreal expectation or standards for ourselves, which is often influenced by our environment and the people in it. When we compare ourselves to others, it can have a huge impact on our confidence and self-esteem.
What keeps Low Confidence/ Self-esteem going?
- Unrealistic Expectations – Holding unrealistic expectations of ourselves or others can be very unhelpful and may only reinforce the idea that we are not capable of meeting these expectations and lower self-esteem further. Trying to meet these demands that may be “impossible” may lead to negative thoughts such as, “I am no good”, “I can’t do anything” etc and even the most minor criticism may be perceived as total failure, rather than being constructive and helpful.
- Anxious predictions – When we have low confidence and low self-esteem, a common way of coping with “worrying” situations, is to focus on “the worst case scenario”. If you feel that you are going to fail then you will make predictions, as such. For example, if you have to stand up and give a talk in public, and you believe that you are a “failure at everything” then you are likely to predict that you will fail at this as well and therefore, you are setting yourself up to fail based on past beliefs, rather then setting yourself up to succeed. This negative cycle of prediction and confirmation of negative beliefs, is known as “confirmation bias” and can often be quite anxiety provoking.
The following therapeutic services are offered for Low Confidence/ Self-esteem;
- One-to-one Therapy
- Family Support